Outspoken Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump released ten reasons why America should take over Canada by force of the American Army and Airforce. On his campaign website, Trump states:
One – Secure our borders! The 9/11 hijackers came through Canada. If I were president during the attack, it never would have happened because I wouldn’t have let them in. Canada’s border along the North Pole is crucial. We need to keep an eye on Russia, and we can’t have Canada doing it when America is way, way better.
Two – The French Canadians. Who needs them? A war with Canada would be like also having a war with France. A two for one war.
Three – Beaver pellets. Their market hold on Beaver pellets is unfair, those beavers are American.
Four – Their money has ducks on it. We would be doing the Canadians a favor by taking them over.
Five – For oil. They are our biggest importer of oil. We’d be safer if it were ours. It would also show the Middle Eastern countries we aren’t afraid to go to war over oil.
Six – I’ll think of more later but trust me, there are at least ten reasons to go to war with Canada, you can see it in their beady Canadian eyes. Something fishy is going on above the current northern border. We could win that war in a day.
D-Trump 2016, Make America Great Again!