While addressing a large group of supporters in Ames, Iowa yesterday, Donald Trump announced that he is taking his campaign to the next level by challenging fellow candidate Dr. Ben Carson to a duel.
The stunned crowd watched as a life-sized cutout of Carson was wheeled to the stage to which Trump yelled, “How dare you fool the fabulous people of Iowa with your pathological behavior! I demand satisfaction!” Trump then removed a white glove from his ‘Make America Great Again’ windbreaker pocket and dropped it at the feet of his cardboard adversary, eliciting wild cheers and chants from the crowd.
“Oh, yes. It is on,” commented George Ross, Mr. Trump’s Second and Executive Vice President and Senior Counsel of the Trump Organization, best known for his recurring role on Mr. Trump’s cancelled reality show The Apprentice. “Dr. Carson has had this coming to him ever since he started to catch up to Mr. Trump in the polls. How dare he? Who does he think he is? Omarosa?”
When asked for comment, Armstrong Williams, Dr. Carson’s business manager, stated that he was unsure if Dr. Carson would take Mr. Trump up on his challenge, but said that he, “would be proud to act as Dr. Carson’s Second” if the need arose and would be more than happy to supply the knives.