Recently leaked memos from within the Trump Organization show that the company’s profits have soared 387% since Donald Trump announced his presidency and relinquished the day to day running of his empire to others, seriously calling into question Mr. Trump’s much-touted business abilities.
The documents, prepared by high-level managers across all of Trumps’s current business enterprises point to many reasons for the success, including the improvement in the economy in general and the strong U.S. dollar, but one recurring theme is that Mr. Trump’s absence has actually allowed people to do their jobs without fear of daily micromanagement and childish reprisals. “The company went from spending a majority of its time on frivolous lawsuits and small-time scams, to now real-time business with a great future outlook. It’s amazing how much real work can be accomplished while not waiting in a courthouse.”
“In the past, most of the New York front and back office staff was lucky to get an hour’s worth of work done in a seven hour day. Mr. T’s constant injection of “ideas” contributed to a very chaotic work environment. Further, his constant bullying created a workforce that often used its “golden hour” to act in ways that could be counterproductive to a healthy bottom line. To put it mildly, employee morale is at an all-time high. We also find a lot less urine in the potted plants”Another memo also mentioned the potential positive effect that Trump’s children’s time on the campaign trail has had on corporate earnings.
Another memo also mentioned the potential positive effect that Trump’s children’s time on the campaign trail has had on corporate earnings. “The campaign’s involvement of the junior Trumps has eliminated the whole sibling rivalry thing at the office. To their credit, they do seem to play well together on a public stage, but the now that they are gone, taking all of their Daddy issues, as well as their own private entourages with them, people are actually starting to look forward to coming to work in the morning. ”
One longtime manager, confirming the existence and accuracy of the memos on a promise of anonymity added, “This has been the best personal year of my career. My therapy sessions are down to three times a week, and I am starting to feel as if I actually have a soul again. And don’t get me wrong, I am very well compensated for all of the bullshit that I put up with from that man. We joke about the fact that we get “combat pay” around here, but for the sake of the country, we hope that he goes back to being our horrible boss come November. We love our country too much. Call us patriots.”
